Majorca Flats 623

failure

Cody’s face grew pinched.

Luigi took a deep breath.  “I was a coward, when the Killer came to the flat.”  He stared out of the window, unable to meet Cody’s eyes.  “I thought of running away, and leaving you.”  He swallowed.  “I’m sorry.”

“But you didn’t.”

“I wasn’t quick enough.  It was you who fought, you who distracted the killer, you who saved us.  Even at the mountain, you were quicker than me to attack the Killer.  You are a hero.  And I am a coward.”

“You could have run away at the petrol station.”

“No, I couldn’t.  He said he’d kill the other people filling their cars.  They were innocent.  They’d done nothing.”

We’d done nothing.  We were innocent,” Cody said quietly.

“Yes, but it our job, our war.  Not theirs. He’d captured us.  He was going to kill us.  It wouldn’t be right.  We had to do our duty.”

“And you did.  You stayed.”

“I phoned Jace from there.  I put the bonnet up and pretended to put water in the radiator.  I had to let him know where we were.  Where we were going.”

“Doesn’t sound cowardly to me.”

“I can’t forget I was ready to run away and leave you.  I should have looked after you.”  He looked away, out of the window.  Without either of them realising it, they were holding hands.  “So, do you want me to call Philippa?”

Cody spoke very quietly. “No, love.  I’m with you now.  Now and always.  I love you.  More than I love anyone else.  You are …. the love I always wanted.  You’re like part of me.  I can’t live without you.  I remember, the first time I saw you in the pub.  It was … I knew then.  I knew.  But I blew it.  I was too cowardly to tell you the truth.  And too cowardly to tell Philippa.”  He twisted his face into a grimace.  “I should never have married her.  I told you about Camden, the guy, my friend before I got married, didn’t I?”

Luigi nodded.

“That should have been a clue.  I kept on telling myself I wasn’t gay.  But I’m in love with you, Lou.  I love you.  How can I be straight and love a bloke?”

“I dunno.  You should talk to Key and Jace.  They are bisexual.  I’m just a ditsy queen.”

Cody squeezed his hand.  “You’re Luigi,” he said quietly, his eyes intent.  “And I love you.  You know, after the Killer took me the first time and I escaped, I suddenly understood that God loved me.  He wanted me to escape.  He made sure the drug the Killer gave me wasn’t too strong to overwhelm me.  He let me escape through the forest. He sent me Michael when I was hiding in the phone box and couldn’t phone because of the ties round my wrists.  He wants me to go on living.  He’s OK with me being gay.”

“The Catholic church wouldn’t agree with that,” replied Luigi bitterly.

“I know.  I don’t care.  I know what’s in my heart.  I love you, Lou.  Always.”

Luigi couldn’t speak past the lump in his throat.  He bent down and kissed Cody’s hand.

At last he whispered, “I love you too, Cody.”

[Episode 622]

A Little Bit Lost

easilycrestfallen

IMG_3187A few days ago, while waiting to catch my plane back to Los Angeles at Kansas City International Airport, I noticed a young man in a bright red polo shirt as I walked to the restroom.  He must have been around twenty, thick glasses not unlike mine.  Skinny and walking around in his stocking feet and carrying brand new sneakers.  It took me a minute to realize he had just come through his security screening.  He looked lost and I wondered if maybe this was his first plane trip.

With some confusion, he looked out the windows to the part of the terminal where family waits for and bids farewell to their loved ones.  Finally his eyes landed on something or someone and he immediately smiled and waved.  His mother and father were outside waving back, his mom jumping up and down a bit. So lucky to be so loved, I…

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Beguiling Heat

COS

Michele Pezzoni by Ira Giorgetti01

Het was een mooie, warme zomerdag in Florence. De schitterende tuin en het fijne zwembad van hotel Il Salviatino zorgden voor beschutting en verkoeling tijdens een relaxte fotoreportage van Londense fotograaf Ira Giorgetti voor Client Magazine. Michele Pezzoni laat ons wegdromen naar die mooie warme zomerdagen. Michele draagt kleding van Danward, Gucci, Hanro en Calvin Klein. Pier Fioraso deed de styling van deze fotoshoot en Luigi Morino deed de grooming. Kijk op de website van Ira Giorgetti voor meer mooi werk.

with kind permission of Ira Giorgetti © 2017

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Something to remember

Originally posted on jaymountney:
I should have posted this yesterday but real life has been overwhelming this last week. It’s a ficlet I wrote a couple of years ago for a picture prompt but I’ve chosen to go with a…

Showing your junk.

Ivansblogworld's

FD00AD88-1F76-494B-8C1B-27D5F74286FE

Nothing wrong with seeing abit of skin, however defining who you by only showing your body, censored or non censored, I just don’t get it.

Jakes Shears, made this very powerful statement.

“We’re placing value in really stupid shit. If all you’re giving the world is your body on Instagram, check yourself, f… off.

If you’re also a brilliant person, and adding to the conversation, then fair enough. If you’ve got nothing else to say, it’s time for some self-examination.

I’m down for a bit of flesh. But if that’s all you’re serving up, you need to check your recipe.”
– Musician Jake Shears, talking to Attitude for its Masculinity Issue.

I am not single, and have not been in the dating, hookup arena for many years so I am no expert, but is the focus now only on body and dick pics. Yes I like a men, but are…

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Not a twink anymore, not yet a muscle queen

Living Gay Brisbane

So I stumbled across this on my discover page the other day. It shouldn’t have bothered me as much as it did, however it really resonated with me and my situation at the moment.

This speaks to the really shallow underside of some gay communities. Are you a muscle gay or are you a twink? If you’re body isn’t one of these two ‘acceptable standards’ then you’re not relevant and you’re not desirable.

I’m this weird middle ground, between skinny and chubby. I’m not fat, but I do have a bit of a gut and the starting of manboobs I guess, but I’m 177cm and 80kgs so I wouldn’t consider myself fat. Unsurprisingly Grindr boys wouldn’t agree though.

I had been chatting to this guy on Grindr for a couple of weeks and I had the house to myself. So I thought why not. I haven’t hooked up with anyone…

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